Master (who will now be called Chris) and I had a meeting on Friday. He took the chain off my ankle, and I am now officially unowned. But he and I both agreed that we didn't want to lose contact with each other. We will still see each other, but there won't be any commitment.

I know this isn't my ideal situation, but neither was the one we had before. I can't say we're play partners because technically, we're not. We won't necessarily be playing every time we get together.

I'm free to seek other relationships, and Chris, being the perverted man that he is, says he wants details if I were to have sex with someone. Fine by me.

Now, to the random thoughts that make no sense.

I was reading something somewhere, and someone gave this definition of a submissive:

A submissive is someone who enjoys being dominated
only in the bedroom, not in everyday life

I know everyone had their own definition of what a submissive/slave is. But I have a big problem with this one.

To me, a submissive can be dominated in and out of the bedroom if he/she chooses and still not be classified as a slave. It could be in a scene, during role-play, or just as simple as giving him/her a back massage.

What's confusing me the most, at the moment, though, is the terminology itself, not the definitions.

I am a slave. We all know that. I submit to my Master. Why doesn't that make me a submissive? Submissive describes my personality. But why aren't I a submissive instead of a slave?

I'm not saying I'd rather be a submissive than a slave. I'm saying I have a submissive personality. And somewhere along the way I've developed the slave mentality (whatever that is).

I think I'm at a point right now where I need to just take a step back. I know this is what I want. I'm not second guessing myself as a woman or as a slave.

I'm just going through the 'whys' and 'hows' again. I don't mind a little introspection. But I've learned a while ago that I'm never gonna find out why I am the way I am, instead of being something else.

Off to bed I go now.

Hope you all have a wonderful Wednesday.